so when I get a fic (or original story manuscript) back from a beta reader/editor I go through and make revisions in two stages.
The first stage I deal with all of the spelling/grammar/"this is not the word you wanted"/"this sentence makes no sense" stuff. This is the hardest part of editing for me because it highlights my weakness. Even though I know every writing has these kinds of issues with their stories and this is one part of what an editor does, it always leaves me in a bad place. So I usually just bite the bullet and go through all of those changes in one big sweep.
After that I have to set the document aside, sometimes for a couple days, and forget it exists. I do other things, other writing and generally recover.
The second part is much easier in some ways and definitely more fun for me. That's the part where I go through the comments about characterization or scene or flow. That's were I rewrite whole sections or try and make the character's motivations more clear. That's when I deal with the fact that my character sighs close to thirty times in one story, or that I know exactly what the cottage in the mountains looks like in my mind but never actually described it anywhere in the story. That part of editing is like a challenge for me, where I get to figure out how to work within the parameters I've already set for myself. When I do that kind of editing I can see the story get better, tighter, more fun to read.
So yes those are my two phases of editing.
I know lots of people who don't use beta readers and that's fine. I person love it when someone beta reads for me though because my editing is extremely poor due to my disabilities.
One of the most awkward things I think however is that first time someone beta reads something for you. It is awkward because you don't really know them as an editor and they don't really know you as a writer and you're not sure how good they are or how much you can trust their work and they're not sure how you'll take any of it. It gets much less awkward if you work with them again, and hopefully continue to do so. The best relationships I've had with beta readers have been with beta readers who worked with me on a pretty regular basis. It was just, I felt, more pleasant and easier for both of us this way. We developed a relationship with each other.
I personally really prefer getting to know the people I work with on a story rather then it always being a one time kind of thing. So if I can choose to have the same beta reader more then once, and that first time is good for both of us, I'll definitely choose that over having someone new every time.
I've touched on this before but I think it's worth repeating, there are some people out there that are going to hate everything you do. There are also some people out their who will love 99% of everything you do but there is no one who will love a 100% of everything you create. Not your most die hard fan, not your best friend, not you significant other, or your mother. Probably not even you.
I think in fandom, when we write fanfiction, or really do any kind of writing that's out their to be read by random strangers, we want everyone to love everything we do. That's fine I think that's a large part of being human, that just can't be your motivating factor. I've felt the pull, to write Y not because I wanted to but because I thought other people wanted to read it. The truth of the mater is even if you bend over backwards to write exactly what you think other people want to read not everyone will want to read it, not everyone will like it.
People not liking the same things as you is fine. If they harass you about it that's not fine but in general you can't please everyone a hundred percent of the time. Even you're most die hard friend won't like everything you do for whatever reason. It doesn't mean what you did was bad, it doesn't mean you need to change or they're better then you for liking X while you prefer Y it's just the way things are.
I've just come to the conclusion that it's better for me to write what I want to write then what I think other people want to read. There is certainly a lot of pressure to conform to the tropes, only write X character this way, or only write Y fandom favorite pairing, or only write sex scenes like this. It's better though, for me, to be fearless like I walked about before, rather then to write something I'm not as into as I could be.